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Coaching Skills & Tips

Coaching is about building a person's confidence and capability, about encouraging them to discover things for themselves, and enabling them to achieve more, developing their gifts and talents in the process.

Building confidence means that you:

Actively listen.
Provide help, support and the necessary resources.
Involve the person in deciding on and setting goals and targets.
Show enthusiasm and belief in the person. Acknowledge the person's successes.
Reflect back to the skills and talents they have already demonstrated.
Are honest about their worries and concerns, openly discussing their fears and looking at the worst possible outcomes.

You can encourage people to find things out for themselves by:

Asking open questions to stimulate them into thinking about what they want to do.
Asking how the person would like to take things forward.
Encouraging them to come up with their own ideas.
Listening to their ideas.
Encouraging them to see the consequences of their proposed actions.
Asking if they have other alternative suggestions.
Offering your own ideas as suggestions.
Asking the person what success looks like.
Giving the person time to think.

Eight coaching tips from those on the receiving end

Treat me as a person in my own right.
Set me a good example.
Encourage and support me.
Praise me when I do well.
Back me up in front of others
Keep me informed about what I need to know.
Take time from your normal duties to coach me.
Never under-estimate what I can do.

Unwilling learners

Not everyone takes kindly to being coached. It may take considerable tact and perseverance to help someone to accept help. Whether someone is willing to be coached may depend on the approach you adopt with them. For example, if you push hard, confront, challenge and criticise, you may simply generate resistance or withdrawal. By staying cool and dispassionate as a coach, you may help learners to think things through for themselves. Yet if you are too distant you may be regarded as impersonal and uncaring. Similarly, an over-enthusiastic coach can motivate through excitement and energy, yet may be seen by some people as intimidating and overwhelming. Be willing to experiment with your coaching style.

See our FAQs on Coaching and Mentoring