Coaching and Mentoring

Mentoring

Mentoring is the process of gaining wisdom from, and tapping into the experience of, others. We all have mentors, whether we call them that or not - heroes, people we seek to emulate, people we've learned from.

Viv Thomas writes of the importance of mentors in his book, Future Leader,

"When I was leading a church it was deeply frustrating to have so little effect on the people I was called to influence and help. The thirty minutes they spent listening to me preach was quickly forgotten. The thoughts triggered in the message did not even seem to reach the car park. It seemed the greatest influence over most of my congregation was held by my family and friends, not their pastor. Their spiritual formation took place primarily in interaction with those close to them; people who helped, understood and listened over a long period of time, or who entered their lives at crucial moments.
As it is with congregations, so it is with leaders. The conditions needed to grown Christians are the same as those needed to grow leaders of Christians. Leaders are in desperate need of friends and mentors, people who will direct us towards God and show us the way. One good and able mentor is worth a  hundred consultants, a thousand motivational or "how to" seminars and only God knows how many sermons. Soul drought, which is the experience of many leaders, is often related to a lack of mentoring."

As leaders we may become mentors to church members or team members. We also need to recognise our need for our own mentors. For it is perhaps our own experience of relating to those who give us their time and wise counsel, that we can best relate to others as mentors.

Coaching

Whilst mentoring focuses on the values and whole person growth, coaching is much more task oriented.  Coaching is the provision of the one to one help necessary for an individual to use their gifts and talents in the ministry of the church.

This one to one help, or coaching, is best provided as part of a structured plan, eg. the Step Plan. In this way there is an expectation that coaching will happen, there is a discussion between coach and church member on where the coaching is required, and a proactive identification of possible ways that the coaching can be delivered. Here are five characteristics of successful coaching.  For greater detail, see our coaching tips page.

Ask questions rather than tell. There is a clear role for showing people clearly what to do, particularly with very simple clerical or repetitive tasks, but there is also a role for asking pointed questions. It is the latter part that most people neglect, yet it can increase the understanding of the person being coached, is more motivating,
Coaching requires giving feedback, but is more than that. People often learn more from being asked how well/badly they did than being told, being asked for opinions or solutions than being told.
Becoming a good coach takes time and effort. You need to slowly build close, open relationships with those you are coaching. You will only develop the skills through practice and experience.
Coaching is in large part to do with listening. Too often people assume that others are the same as them, and therefore that their solutions will work for them. This clearly isn't the case.
See your role as creating an environment where THAT individual can flourish. For example, two plants are one metre apart. One grows to 60cm, the other to 150cm. One is inside the greenhouse, the other is outside. The job of the coach is to create the greenhouse environment around every person they are coaching.

This material is copyright to The Teal Trust, (www.teal.org.uk) � 2002, but may be reproduced with permission for non-profit use.